Sometimes you read blog articles to get more insight into yourself or into your relationship. Other times, though, you don’t want insight because you just want some ideas of things you can do. You want action. This article is for those who want to take action. If you just want some quick and simple tips of how to make a better relationship, here are 3.
Couples that are going through difficult times often find themselves caught in the same cycle. The cycle usually includes the same daily routine, the typical argument, the normal bed-time rituals… It all can get so boring. Surprising your partner helps to break that cycle. A surprise also shows your partner that you were thinking about them and that you care about the relationship.
For this tip, spend some time thinking about what surprise would have a positive impact on his or her day. Some may enjoy a present such as flowers, a treat, or a candle. But others may see more value if a chore is done around the house or that a date night was scheduled. Whatever you decide to surprise them with, it will break the same old cycle and create a positive conversation for the future.
Tip #2: Have Fun!
Speaking of boring – when is the last time you and your partner had fun together? Fun is another part of the relationship that will break the same-old cycle. Also, it is something you can start today and incorporate into your regular routine. What do you and your partner do to have fun together? If the answer is “I don’t know” then it’s time to start trying new things. Having fun again will bring newness and novelty while re-igniting the old spark.
To start having fun today, start by finding things you both enjoy. After you know what you want – prioritize it! This article is about having fun right now – not two weeks from now.
Tip #3: Compliments, Compliments, Compliments..
Genuine compliments help jumpstart nearly every relationship. I specified “genuine” because the generic “You’re a great person” is not the kind of compliment I am talking about. When you notice something that you genuinely appreciate about the other person – tell them! If you like the way they dressed today, the way they smiled at you, their efforts that you haven’t noticed before – tell them! (Extra tip: This can also be in the form of gratitude by thanking them for what you appreciated.)
Start this tip today and make it a habit. As you start to compliment your partner and begin looking for ways to appreciate them, you will notice your relationship improving. This is no coincidence. Have you ever heard of “the law of attraction” or “what you focus on grows”? This is also true within relationships. With the combination of the action of complimenting and putting additional thoughts into what you can continue to compliment, you will go on hyperdrive to a better relationship! Oh, and there’s also good science behind why complimenting your spouse improves your relationship, too.
Surprising your partner helps to break the monotonous cycle in your relationship. Having fun will help you to incorporate newness and novelty while re-igniting the old spark. Compliments and appreciation will ultimately guide your relationship towards relationship satisfaction. Utilize one tip, two tips, or all of the above to create a better relationship for you and your partner right now!
About the Author
Chris Cummins is an intern with The Marriage and Family Clinic. He focuses on working with substance abuse and couples in high conflict. Chris enjoys hiking, traveling, and spending time with his family.